Emailed Jokes - Funny Jokes

One day, a blonde named Sally was putting together a puzzle. She was really
stumped and very frustrated, so she decided to ask her husband for help.

”Honey,” said Dan, “Put the Frosted Flakes back in the box!

Why doesn’t the blonde want to drink beer on the beach?
Because she doesn’t want to get sand in her Busch.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all work at the same office for a female
boss who always goes home early.
“Hey, girls,” says the brunette, “let’s go home early tomorrow. She’ll never
know.”
So the next day, they all leave right after the boss does. The brunette gets
some extra gardening done, the redhead goes to a bar, and the blonde goes home
to find her husband having sex with the female boss! She quietly sneaks out of
the house and returns at her normal time.
“That was fun,” says the brunette. “We should do it again sometime.”
“No way,” says the blonde. “I almost got caught.”

Why do blondes wear big hoop earrings when they go on a date?
So they have some place to put their feet.

What kinds of people don’t get invited to blonde parties?
Women!

A blonde went to electronic store and she asked, “How much is is this TV?”
The salesman said, “Sorry, we don’t sell to blondes.”
The next day she came back as a brunette. She asked the salesman how much the
TV was. He said, “Sorry, we don’t sell to blondes.”
The next day she came back as a red head and asked the salesman how much the
TV was. He said, “Sorry we don’t sell to blondes.”
She replied, “I came in here as a brunette and a red head. How do you know I
am a blonde?”
“Because that is not a TV, it’s a microwave.”

December 1
Blanch carcass from Thanksgiving turkey. Spray paint gold, turn upside down
and use as a sleigh to hold Christmas cards.

Q: How can you tell which blonde is the waitress?
A: She is the one with the tampon behind her ear, wondering what she did with
her pencil.

Q: What did the blonde customer say to the buxom waitress (reading her
nametag)?
A: “‘Debbie’…that’s cute. What did you name the other one?”

Q: How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb?
A1: “What’s a light bulb?”
A2: One. She holds the bulb and the world revolves around her.
A3: Two. One to hold the Diet Pepsi, and one to call, “Daddy!”